My experience of how hearing loss and later total deafness affected my loved ones

It is important to know the extent to which communication processes are affected by hearing loss in practice.  After all, during personal interaction, all those involved must be able to understand and respond to certain concepts and thoughts. Within a family, hearing loss creates several practical challenges that can sometimes make effective interaction very difficult.  Children or grandchildren playing, the music centre/TV/radio being switched on, barking dogs, the sound of a vacuum cleaner and numerous other ambient sounds make meaningful communication a disaster for many involved.

Crucial support systems must be provided to families as a deliberate process. Networks and resources  CAN enable stakeholders to function independently as far as possible. These support structures are driven by nurturing communities.

It is sad that people WHO HAVE hearing loss are often mistakenly branded as “aloof” and “disinterested” by their loved ones. They are often referred to as “hard of hearing” and people who are not really interested in what others have to say. Sometimes also that he/she has “selective” hearing, i.e. only hears when he/she prefers it. This is of course a myth, and all due to misunderstanding and ignorance regarding the functional consequences associated with hearing loss.

 Hearing loss can, for example, lead to the person sometimes turning up the volume of the TV or radio too loudly, not being aware that he/she has not turned off a tap, interrupting other people or talking too loudly; all to the frustration or embarrassment of the person involved and others.

Hearing impairment or deafness can greatly affect a person’s self-confidence, which will make him/her reluctant to participate in social activities – especially in cases where there are high levels of background noise, poor lighting, poor acoustics and/or lack of a good sound system. It can contribute to the turmoil in interpersonal relationships.

The good news is that hearing aids/cochlear implants, supportive listening and living devices, and ALTERNATE methods of communication are extremely positive steps that can be taken to promote good interaction and social integration. There are numerous steps that can be taken to reduce frustration and conflict, and encourage harmony.

It is advisable to make sure that the room is well lit and that the volume of the TV and other devices are completely muted, before the family or circle of friends participate in important conversations, as quality of speech is clearer without competition from background noise. For the sake of family harmony, remember that hearing impairment or deafness requires a change of attitude from all parties.

Creating an accessible environment and independent functioning is a process through which adequate professional and/or peer support services, resources, technology and personal assistance must be made available to people WHO HAVE hearing loss and their families. This will enable stakeholders to make better choices, accept MUTUAL responsibility and be empowered to compete on an equal footing with others.

This is my experience of what is meant by equal human inclusion within the wider community.

Fanie du Toit
Mentor, Hearing Loss Matters
NCPD